Monday, April 27, 2009

239- Videography

I created this video a little while ago--- it's my first attempt at videography utilizing VISTA movie maker-- I have in the past interned with an advertising agency where I utilized more professional programs-- due to that I noticed a lot of limitations in terms of the capability to edit lengths of the clips and include "supers"(text over the images). I realize it's a little rough on timing -- but as afore mentioned it was hard to get the timing right when you mess up everything that goes on after it-- I'm working on another video right now-- so that one will be more to my standards (promise) Hope you like!!!

239!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


It's time to celebrate because I weighed myself this morning and it turns out I have officially lost 50lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Saturday, April 18, 2009

244.5-- It's Not About Me

This blog has been entirely about my weight loss and the struggle I have endured while trying to make sense of it all-- trying to regain my footing-- working through failed relationships. I came to the realization today with the help of a friend that it's not about me. It's not about me at all. The weight, the emotions I've held deep inside, the failed relationships, the abuse, the hurt, the depression, the weight loss, the food, the exercise the 3 dreaded numbers-- all of the things in my life-- none of them are about me, not ONE.

While both good and bad things have happened in my life-- none of them were about me or for me really. These experiences serve a greater purpose-- they serve as a testimony that bad things do not equate being bad and good things do not always necessarily equal good. My experiences both good and bad are meant to help others. God has set a fire in my heart to share the embarrassing and awful things (as well as the good) that I've gone through-- to show you it's ok-- to help you understand you too can get through it all! I'm not by any means an authority on anything really-- all I can tell you is the honest truth and not only hope but know that it will speak to you.

I'm still going to focus on my weight loss journey-- but I'm also going to share with you the things that have shaped me. (which trust me, as you'll see soon enough, is a huge step in humility)

I'd have to say over the past 6 months that I've been on this journey (and 47lbs lost) there has been such a change in me. A change in not only my physical appearance but also a change in my heart-- a change in perspective. The change in weight is only a manifestation of what's been going on in the inside.

Once I got pissed enough with where my life was-- with who I was--- it was easy to change.. I started to see the bad parts.. and it was a matter of cutting out the cancer that was bringing me down-- it's honestly been a life changing experience and although it's such a simple concept it's a process. Although things happened to me-- I didn't choose them-- they chose me and that really is not my problem-- my job is merely to overcome the challenges-- to except them full heatedly-- no matter what happens to me it's not a reflection of the type of person I am.

When you strip away all of the things that aren't about you-- it's really a huge weight that's lifted-- a burden that was always too heavy and never intended for me to bare. When that weight is lifted the most beautifully awful thing happens-- you start to realize that all of those things that weren't about you are gone-- and what's left IS about you! That's where it can be difficult; to admit what YOU have done to impact the lives of others in both a positive and negative way because that really is ALL ABOUT YOU.

I have a lot more to say about all of this- but I wanted to share with you what is up and coming with this blog. It's just another discovery for me on the journey that I feel compelled to share with you.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

246.5 --You've lost 40 lbs in Your Face


I periodically will send "progress" photos to close friends and family. One thing that was getting a little annoying is that my Mom kept saying "I can really tell you lost weight in your face" -- I was hoping after 47lbs a lot more than my face would look thinner. -- But something utterly amazing happened. I came across a photo of me at my highest weight-- and I couldn't believe how much different my face really did look. So for fun I created a montage of photos of my face. The top 3 are me at my heaviest and the lower 4 read from left to right in order of heaviest to lightest. The two to the far right were taken this past week when I was on vacation. You really can see quite a difference. I plan on posting more pics once I get them from my friend Sarah, who I was down visiting. A majority of the pics were taken on her camera and now she has a virus on her comp-- there are some full bodies on there that I'll share with you guys when I get them.

47lbs in my face.. not bad really I guess. :o)

Monday, April 13, 2009

I'm Back! 247

This is going to be a short post just to let you know I'm still around and kicking. These past 3 weeks have been very difficult because I've been dealing with my two herniated discs in my back. This last week was also the week I spent down in New Orleans/ Biloxi -- unfortunately the week before I left I hurt my back and it started to feel better and then the plane ride really did a number on it.. then is started to feel better and the plane ride home made it worse again. I then went on a 5 hour drive to my Grandma's for Easter and back again (again making my healing back worse) at this point it's the worst it's been over the 3 week period. I'm considering going into the doctor for it :o(. This also means I haven't been able to be as active as I've wanted-- I haven't stepped on the scale until today where it shows I've gone from 242 to 247-- well see how accurate a reading this is over the next couple of days.. if it does prove to be accurate it will be very disappointing. I'm getting anxious to get back to the gym. I will post more pictures when I get a chance (I've felt really bad being away from the blog so long).